Why do we call him son?

Original post from Sept. 22, 2013>
I could sit here and write about how I felt first walking into clinic, how my day was working as a pharmacist, or how no one understood when I called out their names with my American accent…but it doesn’t seem important in comparison to telling you things about Shafic. He is truly a spark of light in each day, his smile is precious and sweet, and he each word he speaks feels like it is straight from his heart, pure and true. Shafic is 14, almost 15, he is a big boy (taller than me) and he has been at Hands of Love for at least 3 years.

I want to go back for a moment to the “son” story (I briefly mentioned this on my last post). Justin and I have always written to Shafic and our two other boys (at the Namadhi location) and addressed them each as “son”. It always felt right and seemed like a good thing to do, like God put it on our hearts to do. On Thursday, after lunch, the children did a performance for us. They sang a beautiful song about how the orphans cry and about how hungry they once were and how scared they once were…..during this part the children were very emotional (as were we), some of the children even had tears in their eyes….it just completely broke my heart. BUT then the song changed, it got more upbeat and lively, and they began to sing about how God brought them to Hands of Love and how happy they are because they now have parents, they are loved by their parents, and have protection because of their moms and dads. In this very moment of the song, I broke down, I tried to keep from crying but I couldn’t. I realized for the first time that Justin and I, no matter how many miles away we live, are Shafic’s parents. We are all the family he knows and has left here in this world. We are his parents now, and Shafic, he is our son.

Today, Sunday, in church we were to turn to the person next to us and say “I am blessed because I am here”, and when I turned to tell Shafic he said with no hesitation in his voice, “I am blessed because you are here, Mom”. I felt like the luckiest person in the world…..I am so proud to be his mom. I am truly blessed by Shafic. He is my son now and forever. I don’t know what the far future holds for him….I don’t know if he will stay here the rest of his life or maybe one day make his way to America….but I do know I love him so. Meeting him has been the second best moment of my life. When I tell him I love him, I mean it with all my being. And when he says back to me “I love you, mom”, there is nothing sweeter. It will be so hard to tell him bye, until next time (because it will not be bye forever). I am trying not to think about that moment.

I find comfort though each night as I pray….I am so incredibly grateful to our great God; that he proclaims in His word to be the Father of all orphans, that He loves them so, that His heart breaks when theirs does, and that He protects them, and mostly I am thankful that He has so blessed Justin & I with these sons.

God thank you for being Shafic’s almighty Father,
thank you for protecting him when we did not even know his name.
Thank you for loving him, always.
Thank you for blessing Justin and I with the opportunity to come on this trip.
Thank you for blessing us with a son.
Thank you for blessing us with Shafic’s sweet presence.
You are a great God.
Your plan is perfect. And I rest with that peace and promise each night.
Thank you.

Shafic is on the left of this first photo, in the light blue shirt (matching his Dad). :)
I also have a lot of photos with Derrick (the small one in green) he is Whitney, my sister’s Ugandan son. Wayyyy more to tell you later.

My love overflows...

Original post from Sept. 19, 2013>
Where do you begin to describe a day like today? A day so touching and moving that you don’t feel like your words will do it justice? What I wish is you that each of you reading this could have been my eyes and ears for just a moment of time today. It would change your life and your heart forever.
We first drove into the orphanage around noon, the children were all standing together at the gates chanting “Wel-e-come”, which is welcome, they just break up the word very distinctly while enunciating. They had signs for each volunteer that said “Dear, Justin/Allie/etc. we love you!” There were chants and screams and HUGE hugs and high fives. All the children, and I mean all of them, greeted us with hugs and proper hand shakes. I fought (incredibly hard) to hold back my tears, of course they were tears of pure, deep joy, but I didn’t want to startle or worry the children. They were so unbelievably happy to see us, and I felt the same way. It was a special bond we all shared immediately.

We went into a classroom and within minutes I spotted our boy, Shafic. My heart literally stopped….I breathed a deep breath….and as I walked over to him, I felt immense happiness. A happiness I really can’t describe. I totally forgot to introduce myself, which would have been proper. Instead I threw my arms around him and held him so tight. I wanted him to know I was I there for him, not just in that moment, but always. Shafic immediately loved Justin. Shafic looked up to him and smiled so big, it reached both his eyes, he was almost squinting, and in that moment I could tell he felt like he had a real, tangible man to look up to, to play with, and to hug on! I must have told Shafic a million times how much we loved him, I never want him to forget. At one point, after reading a letter Justin and I wrote him, he looked at his hands, fumbled with them for a second and then clearly he said “I love you both.” One single tear escaped my eye and I looked right to Justin who’s eyes has already filled with many tears. Pure, true, deep joy. God is so, so good.

Here we were in Africa, a million miles away from everything we ever known..and we fell in love with this sweet, sweet boy. Shafic gives me hope and happiness and he brings a smile to my face each time a thought of him crosses my mind. He is our son, maybe he lives in Uganda and maybe he looks different and speaks a different language, but he is our son. (I will write a whole post in this “son” moment later).

Our day kept us busy, we toured the school and the living quarters and we met the amazing house moms that care for the orphans…most of them have 30+ children to care for (and one of them had forty 3 & 4 year olds. Wow. I felt a deep need to look them each in the eye and thank them, I wasn’t sure where our boy, Shafic, stayed at this point (our other boys are at a more rural orphanage), but I knew they each had someone’s boy or girl and they kept them safe, cared for them when ill, read them stories at night, sang them songs and most of all loved them. For Shafic and for all the other children, I am forever grateful to those house moms and the incredible work they do.
I have so much more to tell you, but for now know this….God is amazing, He has protected and cared for these children when their parents could not…and He brought them all to Hands of Love. And that’s truly what the organization is, they are the true hands of love. Love is all you see there.
(This is posted from my iPhone so pls ignore all errors) 

Uganda. Tomorrow.

Original post from Sept. 16, 2013>
Yes, that’s right. Tomorrow. As in less than 24 hours from now, J and I will be sitting at an airport waiting to board the plane to embark on this crazy, beautiful journey.
I say crazy because, well, I never imagined that I would be doing anything of this sort. Partly because I wasn’t sure that I would ever be “up” for a mission trip, partly because I didn’t think it would all pan out when my friend and I started talking about it, and mostly because I spent years feeling so awkward and useless around kids that I never imagined I would go half way around the world to serve and play with them….but God has a funny way of doing things, so here I am.
I’ve spent the past three years, since I welcomed my very first nephew into this world, learning how best to love kids and honestly, just learning to be myself around them. I think my mother-bear, nurturing instincts were buried inside me all along, I just needed a reason to find them. And my sweet nephew was that reason….then came more nephews, and the amazing kids & volunteers at My Sister’s House, and then sponsoring our three boys at Hands of Love….AND NOW UGANDA.

“All your children will be taught by the Lord, and great will be their peace.” Isaiah 54:13
Fast forward to today….and I absolutely adore kids, I love playing with them, making them giggle, teaching them, learning with them, being the fun person in the playground, being the disciplinary (because they need it and it only means I love them that much more), building forts with them, making up games to play, dancing with them to random music, and watching them fall asleep in my arms. I’ve fallen in love with kids. God truly has worked in this heart of mine for so long. I feel like my love for kids is similar to how God loves me, unconditionally and beyond any circumstances (1 John 4:19). One day, I hope to have my own kids and I also hope to adopt a few, hopefully from Uganda. : )More on that some other time.
All that to say, I am so ready to go to Uganda and fall more in love with these children. Expect nothing less.

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. -James 1:27

Why Uganda, Africa?

Original post from Sept. 11, 2013>
Almost two years ago, a very dear friend of mine was telling me this incredible story about a man she met at the hospital (she’s a Physician Assistant). This man, Jeff, told her an amazing story about how he was going to adopt a boy from a Ugandan Orphanage. He had heard about the orphanage through friends & family and felt called to action, so he sponsored a few kids there. Eventually the calling felt stronger and Jeff & his wife knew they wanted and needed to adopted a child from the orphanage….so they left their biological children here in the US and went to Africa to find their soon-to-be adopted child. No doubt this was a hard process, how could they ever pick just one lucky child. Well, something truly divine happened on their trip….when Jeff was touring the living quarters, he saw a pair of shoes and said “Oh, my son has those.” (speaking about his son here in the US). The orphanage pastor looked the man straight in the eye and said, “Yes, he does.” That very boy, who had those shoes at the orphanage, is now their son.

When my friend told me this story I had goosebumps….what an incredible story! That story stayed on my heart, so later I asked my friend for details on the orphanage, but she couldn’t remember. I thought it was lost forever, but as fate would have it….Justin and I went to meet friends (Mark & Debbie) for a concert just a few weeks later and our friends began telling us about how they had just sponsored a few kids at this incredible Ugandan orphanage, Hands of Love. I knew it was the same orphanage as they began to tell the adoption story, my heart leaped and just a few short weeks later Justin and I began to sponsor three beautiful boys. Meet Sula, Muzaifah and Shafic (photos below). Precious, aren’t they? Over the past two years, we have written each other letters, sent photos back and forth, and even, on some occasions, sent gifts. I cannot tell you how much our lives have been blessed by these boys. And not just by them, but also this unbelievable orphanage and the people that work so hard to make a difference. This orphanage sees Uganda with a bright future. They see these children with a successful road ahead of them. They see light in a place of deep darkness. A place where human sacrifice, violence towards women, and cannibalism still exists today. It takes my breath away, literally, every time I think about these children getting so much love in a place that has such darkness.

My “dear friend” (from the beginning of the story) went to serve the orphanage in August of 2012. As a PA she had a lot of offer. Her and a group of nurses and doctors set-up a clinic to serve the women and children of Uganda. She met our three boys and her kids too…..she was so deeply touched by her experience. It truly changed her heart forever. So that’s why we chose Uganda and the Hands of Love orphanages, because God put this in front of us….He set our hearts on fire for these beautiful Ugandan children and He will change us forever with this one incredibly journey.
Follow us, as we go. I can’t promise to write everyday, but I will write as often as I can.

with love...